Bridges could sometimes be scary by Bambi Lynn

Recently my grandson and I went on an adventure together. He is the best person to take with you on an adventure. He isn't afraid of much and he makes me laugh and feel young again. We were going to every path we could find from the main road on Jekyll Island. We would get out of the car and follow the path where every it would lead us. I would stop and take pictures and he would complain then go along with it. Until we came upon this bridge. I tried to get psyche to cross the bridge but, deep down I am thinking no way. I walked a little bit on it just to show Jonah it was safe. He wasn't having it. The bridge could get us to the other side but, it was really low to the water line, and it looked a little scary. I wanted to get to the other side but, both of us decided it wasn't safe enough and we turned around. We ended up taking another path that led us right back to this bridge but, on the other side. made me start thinking about how safe a bridge was to meet on?

                                         Build bridges not walls!

We have heard this statement so many times, that I think it in engrained in our minds, but we are never told that bridges could be scary to meet on. I was thinking about the "Shot that could be heard around the world" The Revolutionary War started on a bridge. Did those men who were standing on that bridge feel safe? Did they know their fate? Were these men thinking that a bridge teaches you to meet in the middle and everything could be worked out on the bridge? I believe that bridge was pretty scary that day, that bridge started the course of the War of independence. It would be seven years before they would meet again on that bridge. I guess you could say, building a bridge instead of a wall takes time.

 A few years back I had the privilege to walk across one of the deadliest bridges in America, As I walked across this bridge about every thirty feet you would see a sign with a hotline number on it to call if you are feeling hopeless. More people have lost their lives on this bridge than any other bridge in America, you must have guessed by now it is the Golden Gate Bridge in San Fransico. Since the bridge was built in 1937, there has been at least 1700 deaths that have happened on that bridge in the form of suicide. People have been led to this bridge with a hopelessness that was so low that they thought at that moment, there life wasn't worth living. They were so desperate for the pain to stop and for their mind to stop telling them the lies that brought them to the moment to jump, to these lost souls a bridge was a freedom from themselves. But really it was hopelessness that brought them to this bridge.They weren't willing anymore to meet anyone, for they lost all hope in getting rid of the voices in their head. They gave up thinking that things could get better, Not realizing at that moment that jumping would end all chances of anything ever changing because their hope was gone. This bridge didn't give hope for the walls to come down and meet in the middle, this bridge took the chances away. maybe there had already been to many chances at the bridge? Now it became of bridge of hopelessness because all hope was gone. Not a bridge to meet in the middle. My question again, are bridges really the safest place to meet?

Just recently there was a bridge collapse in Maryland, where a cargo boat lost power twice and the second time the boat crashed into a bridge. Six people were killed. That bridge is a vital part of people getting from one side to another. Those six people had no idea that going across a bridge that day would be their fate. Their families had no idea they would be getting a call that their loved ones weren't coming home because of a bridge collapse. Their lives all have changed on that bridge. They will never be the same.

 quotes about bridge building:

 Kindness means building bridges instead of walls

 Instead of building walls, we should be building bridges

Building bridges takes us farther than building walls

We build to many walls and not enough bridges

In the moment of crisis, the wise build bridges and the foolish build dams

Greatness is not measured by the walls we build but by the bridges

  All these quotes make it sound so easy, we can read and say,"ya let's do that" But people who have experienced such pain meeting at the bridge look at things so differently. They had hopes that things would change if they met in the middle, but they walked away only to build another layer of their wall. Bridges leave you vulnerable. The person you are meeting in the middle has their own agenda than the bridge isn't a safe place to meet for you. To meet at the bridge, you need an agenda to make sure that all that meet there get their needs met and their voice heard, I realize what people mean by building bridges and not walls. but a lot of time it's not the same people who have been hurt or know that kind of pain that has caused a wall in the first place. The bridge has to be safe; I don't think that walls are built immediately. All the elements must come together before the meeting at the bridge. Work has to take place in the individual lives in order for the meeting to be healthy. If you show up with no work being done than the safety of the bridge becomes a collapse bridge, and a new layer of the wall is added. It is okay, not to meet right away at the bridge. But it's not okay to put a wall around you. Healing can take place and walls can drop before you walk across the bridge. If you choose to have your healing be without a bridge with someone else. but, just yourself, there is healing in that too!!  Choose what is safe for you until your courage overtakes you and you are healthy enough to go forward with whatever happens. My grandson and I said, no to the bridge, we were given another way to get to the other side, And so will you!!!

                    BURN IT,CROSS IT,MEET IN THE MIDDLE,OR JUST FORGET ABOUT IT, ALL THESE DECISIONS ARE OKAY!!